Saudi Girl Writes About Her Everyday Life & Experiences in Saudi Arabia

Dependency Of An Arab Girls

Empowering Arab civil societies is doomed to fail without empowering 50% of the Arab societies (girls and women). Concepts such as empowerment, dependence, independence, autonomy, self-reliance, etc are tricky. They lend themselves of over-simplification and over-generalization and other black and white and extreme interpretation. Most humans don’t deal well with vague, slippery, and unclearly defined, or clearly undefined concepts. There is no absolute dependence or absolute independence, only a mix of different proportions of the two. Social and moral judgment—not known for its sophistication—has it that independence is “good,” and dependence is “bad.” Or to put it in relative terms, independence is better than dependence. However, a close examination of an average day reveals the depth of the problem of separating dependence from independence. We no longer hunt and gather our food; we simply go to the supermarket to buy it. After all we are not interested in going back to becoming hunters and gatherers. We are dependent on the supermarket, the gas company, the electric company, the phone company, endless manufacturers and so on.

For the sake of economy, I am focusing I this essay on the negative aspects of dependency when Arab girls are indoctrinated with it from a very early age. Indoctrination is another word that lends itself to misuse and misunderstanding as there is a fine line—very fine—between education and indoctrination. To reduce vagueness and be more illustrative, I shall use indoctrination to refer to dogmatic teaching that does not induce free thinking or skepticism in the learner; rather it induces obedience to the teacher’s scripture in the broadest sense of the word “scripture.” My intended focus is on indoctrinating Arab girls with passivity, helplessness, “being at the mercy of,” or dependent on males, teaching them to have no say and disempowering them by painting a future that is plagued with unhealthy dependence, and teaching them acceptance of the tremendous power differential that exists between male and female.

It is unfortunate that even in the West (broadly defined), the female “role models” are presented in the children’s programs such as Cinderella, Snow White, Pocahontas, Tarzan, Aladdin, The Little Mermaid, Beauty and The Beast, Rapunzel, Thumbelina, The Nutcracker, and others is the that of the passive/dependent role. Girls are taught through these Disney characters that the heroine gets rescued by a handsome prince. All that she has to do is sit there and look pretty. Is this what we want to teach our daughters? Not only these heroines/role models are teaching passivity and dependence to young girls (west and east), but also they are sending them a clear message that they, independent of a male savior, are not worthy on their own, and that their biggest asset is their beauty. The female role model is frequently just a “model” and her prince is a male “model.”

Movies and cartoons (including the supposedly family-friendly Disney ones) may be excused as entertainment. However, children’s books teach reading while sending an almost a constant message about the female roles that girls learning to read absorb the role of the passive beauty waiting for the knight with the shining armor on his white horse to save her (and don’t forget the sexualized overtones). Where are the female role models whom Arab girls can model themselves after; an independent, self-sufficient, ambitious woman who depends on her wits and hard work more than on her beauty?

Another dimension to this male-dominant indoctrination is religious instruction. The three patriarchal religions, Judaism, Christianity, and Islam more or less share this male domineering indoctrination giving it the divine stamp of approval. These three monotheistic, Abrahamic, patriarchal religions all teach obedience and submission to the sill of the ultimate male, God himself. There is not a single doubt the God is a male. Not only that, but the talk of the lip service that this religion or that gives women equal rights and respect etc. is disingenuous. In Islam, just for example, the female gets from her parents half the inheritance that her brother is entitled to, the same thing in court, her testimony does not equal that of a man, she is to obey her husband, she is to accept being one of four wives etc.

The message is loud and clear, you, the Arab girl, is inferior to your brother. What does that do to self-esteem on the long, one can only imagine.

via: arabdemocracy

Saudi Girl Beaten By Her Father For Talking Online on Facebook

A leading Saudi preacher believes the Facebook website is a ‘door to lust’ A woman was beaten up and shot dead by her father for talking online with a man she met on the website Facebook. The case was reported on a Saudi Arabian news site as an example of the “strife” the social networking site is causing in the Islamic nation. It said the man shot his daugther after discovering she had been chatting online to a young man she had met on Facebook.? Security sources assured Al-Arabiya.net that the father beat up his daughter and then shot her dead,? it said. A leading Saudi preacher told Al-Arabiya.net that Facebook was a “door to lust” for women and called for it to be blocked to prevent social “strife”. Sheikh Ali al-Maliki said women were posting “revealing pictures” and “behaving badly” on the site, which has become popular with young Saudis. Internet engineers said that young Saudis were using Facebook to flirt and make “web-cam calls”. Saudi Arabia imposes an austere form of Sunni Islam which prevents unrelated men and women from mixing, bans women from driving and demands that women wear a headscarf and cloak in public.

Women in Saudi Arabia are using Facebook and other networking sites to chat to men One female Saudi Facebook fan told The Mail that blocking the site would be pointless because people would simply switch to similar sites. The 27-year-old woman, who did not want to be named, admitted many young Saudis used Facebook to get in touch with members of the opposite sex. ?In Saudi Arabia, we live more of a virtual life than a real life. I know people who are involved in on-line romances with people they have never met in real life,? the woman said. ?And many of us use Facebook for other things, like talking about human rights and women’s rights.
“We can protest on Facebook about the jailing of a blogger which is something we couldn’t do on the streets.” Engineers also told Al-Arabiya.net that there were Facebook pages for homosexual and lesbian relations. Homosexuality is illegal in Saudi Arabia and is punished by flogging, jail or even death. The Saudi authorities block access to websites they deem sexual, pornographic, politically offensive, “un-Islamic” or disruptive because of controversial religious and political content.
But Syria is the only Arab country so far to have blocked Facebook. When the ban was enforced in December, Syrian media said it was to prevent Israeli users from infiltrating Syrian social networks.

via:dailymail

Life of Women and Men in Saudi Arabia

Posted by admin in Saudi Girls Life on 06 13th, 2010 | no responses

Let’s think about it…taking the culture and customs into consideration, who really has it better in Saudi Arabia? The Man or the Woman? True, women cannot drive but that means a man is expected to either transport the woman where she needs to go or to provide a driver for her. The Saudi man is expected to take care of the woman. For example he is to provide her housing, clothing, furnishing of the house in a manner to which she is accustomed. He is also expected to give her spending money for herself and which she is not accountable. On the other hand if the Saudi woman is working, her income is her own. She is not mandated to share it in any way with her husband. Her savings are her own.
Interestingly I was chatting with some Saudi friends about this very topic. The predominant view among them (male and female) was that the female had it better than the man. The man has more pressure and responsibilities attached to the fact that he is a man. He must work; he must provide; he should not ask his wife for contributions or expect her to contribute. The Saudi guys shared that in their observation the women enjoy having their needs met by the men and most women realize they are treated like a queen in that regard.
Most women are provided with a housemaid, a driver and no pressure applied to them to contribute financially to a household. As a result it is not unusual for many of these women to enjoy taking various classes at either universities or other institutions and perhaps at some juncture taking a part time job. Why not since the majority of tasks within the home are overseen and taken care of by the housemaid. The man on the other hand not only has to provide for his wife but is usually expected to provide for his mother and sisters too (especially if they are widowed). The Saudi men with whom I have spoken feel that a woman cannot understand the constant pressure they are under as the primary provider for so many view women as cherished and cosseted.
via:americanbedu

Interview With Rajaa Alsanea – The Author Of Book “The Girls of Riyadh”

Posted by admin in Saudi Girls on 06 13th, 2010 | no responses

The author of “The Girls of Riyadh” is doing the US media circuit to promote the new publication of her book in English. Here’s a taste, but make sure to read the whole profile:
Finding love in Saudi Arabia is practically impossible, especially for young Muslim women.

That’s the premise 25-year-old author Rajaa Alsanea tackles in her novel, “Girls of Riyadh,” which has already created a stir throughout the Arab world.

“In Saudi, there are a lot of restrictions,” she said during an interview at the University of Illinois at Chicago’s College of Dentistry. Alsanea is pursuing a master’s degree in oral sciences before returning to Riyadh to live with her family, practice dentistry and continue writing fiction.

“We’re living in the 21st century, and there are still traditions from the 19th century, and that’s just insane,” she said. “You have the Internet … and freedom of speech. You have modern schools and modern hospitals. And everything around you is digital. And yet you have to go through all this pain when you want to get married.”

…”It’s my obligation to try to fix things in Saudi. I’m not trying to fix the government or Islam. What I’m trying to fix is mentality, how people think. It’s the traditions,” she said. “These traditions either [need to] loosen up, or we should get rid of them.”

via: ordoesitexplode